I am in something of a bad place in my life right now, because I just don’t feel like I am good enough. The newest Lydia Bennet video set off this feeling inside of me that makes me feel inadequate in a different way. This is not about me feeling horrible about my body image or anything, though that may have always been a problem in the beginning, but I have learned to cope with myself as someone who is not as skinny as a rail. I have never known what it is like to be someone who deserves the love of someone else. It is hard to be a girlfriend to anyone when you are forever seen as nothing more than a friend. I have decided to give up the ghost and admit to myself that I will only be able to be with someone who is as nerdy as me. I am very nerdy. I am just not sure what to do with myself when, as a writer, I feed off of things I know, and I can’t write about love if I have no idea what it is…..