There is that one moment in everyone’s life when they realize that things are not going as they are meant to be. For some of us it comes about when we are in high school, for others it may even wait to happen until we are engaged to that one person we thought were going to be what we needed for the rest of our lives. This moment happened to me when I was left with nothing else to go on but a limb that felt as if it were breaking beneath me. That branch was the line between going after what I really wanted to have in my life, and what everyone else thought that I needed.
My name is Lenexa Hawthorne, and I found what I was looking for after my first year of college had fallen to pieces and I was left having to transfer to a different college. The particular one where I had sworn I would never apply because it struck me as something that I didn’t need within my life at that moment. I had started out going to an expensive college that was prestigious and just what everyone else had always wanted to get into. Apparently there was an actual waiting list to get into this college, but I had happened to bypass all of that in less than 3 months.
When my grandfather had passed away my senior year of high school my family didn’t have much to be excited about anymore. All of us were having a hard time coping with the loss of a member of our family, and when my acceptance letter to Gritamish College came in the mail it was the one thing that everyone else could focus on as a great achievement. At the time that I had gotten accepted into that school I had really been vying for a spot at another school that wasn’t nearly as expensive as GC. Something unexpected happened to our family soon after that though.
My first choice accepted me, and I was going to have my first year almost nearly covered, and then my parents separated with the intention of getting divorced. Now, I wasn’t upset that they were getting divorced, I was ecstatic actually, but I was worried about what it would do to my home life. In order to give my mother something that she could be proud of while she was going through all of that bullshit with my father I choose to go to Gritamish. I thought that everything would be alright, and it was for a while, but I realized that running away from my problems to a college I didn’t even really want to be at wasn’t something that made a lot of sense to me. I ended up failing a ton of classes and coming back home after that first year. I enrolled at the local school where I am still taking classes at this very moment. I made the Dean’s List, and am now trying to figure out when I want to transfer to another college. The one I plan to transfer to was actually my first choice back the end of my high school career.
The moral of my story today is that everyone needs to do what they think will be better for themselves, not what they think will make someone else proud. It won’t help you out later in life if you are miserable just because you decided to play the martyr. No one likes a self-pitying person, and when you do things that make you happy rather than what makes other people happy you will exceed even your own expectations.